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Saturday 30 July 2011

Why Do Older Men Chase Younger Women?

It is a universal issue as I see men from all over the globe, and of all ages, even into their 70's and 80's trying to pick up 20-somethings. It happens with men from all socio-economic backgrounds, no matter how attractive they are, what they have to offer in terms of material wealth, intelligence, sexual potency or their ability to love. They promote all of the above, even to extremes if they possess them in hopes that one of these youths will bite their hook and be reeled in. They will use the most cunning bate, like fatherly-type advise with vulnerable women, diamonds for economically poor women, promises of undying love for the lonely women and tales of physical strength and courage for the weak ones.

What's more fascinating is that they don't just target young women, but the most beautiful ones they can sleuth out. Women who are genetic and generic models of what modern society deems beautiful. And these girls are the ones that are most vulnerable, poor, lonely and weak of them all because they don't know yet that they have far more to offer other than their beauty (and sex), making them the perfect targets for these men.

I study social networking sites and dating sites, and it is the same story, over and over again...young women advertising with their bodies and older men advertising with their material possessions. I'd like to believe we have evolved as human beings over the centuries, but honestly, it all still looks like cave-man tactics to me...the females looking for the males with the biggest caves, and the males clunking the females on the head and dragging them back to their lairs by the hair. It is not surprising to me at all that men still love women with long hair.

It makes me feel sad when I see it, day after long day. It makes me sad for the young women who have not yet discovered their real value and strength as women, and it makes me sad for these men who devalue themselves in ways that reveals that they are the ones who are truly vulnerable, poor, lonely and weak. It also makes me sad because there is part of me that does not want to be powerful and independent, and really wants to be knocked on the head and dragged to some great cave on the Mediterranean sea where the stone (marble) shelves are stocked with caviar and fine champaign, and the canoe (yacht) is anchored just off shore and ready for any number of adventures.

When I was in my early 20's and could have sold my beauty to any king. And at that time, I had a conversation with an older man (who incidentally was into very young and beautiful women like myself), and he told me point-blank: "marry for money, not for love." I'll never forget his words. It was like he was imparting some sacred secret that only an elite few were privy to. But I had already experienced love by that time (actually with his son, as a little side note), and I knew it was more valuable than any amount of money (or caves or canoes) could buy. And I know this still today. Holding onto my values has made me a strong and powerful women, and most men can not be with a woman like me. It threatens their frail egos as they robustly continue their quest for the young and the restless.

But the question still has not been answered. One possibility came from a wonderful film called Moonstruck with Nicholas Cage and Cher, when Olympia Dukakis asks Danny Aiello why men chase women (referring to the old professor who is constantly chasing young women), and his reply was "because they are afraid of dying". It was a brilliant "Ah-Ha!" moment for Dukakis' character in the film and a brilliant one for me as well. I don't know if this is the answer to my question, but I believe it comes close.

So, on I go, witnessing the naive nature of the young and the pitiful nature of the old as I continue to hold tight to my values. I will continue to watch for changes in human nature, but don't really expect to find any. There will always be crusty old fishermen out there sharpening their hooks, and there will always be young girls who are too innocent not to bite them. In the meantime, I don't have any plans to cut my hair.


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